Get Physical meets their bus

Get Physical meets their bus

5 May, 2008 | 1.55PM

• Section: Music News Topics: Get Physical Tour
• Written by: Industry Boy

“What the fuck is this?!” shouted Heidi last night at the Underbar club in Boston during her set.

She pointed at the DJ set up, which admittedly did look quite odd but nothing out of the ordinary, until she pointed out the turntables were actually bouncing as they were on springs.

A line above some metal grills on the DJ booth noted the ‘sound was by Angel Morales’.

Heidi pointed at the DJ mixer which was a Urei rotary mixer.

“Is this from the 1970s?” she said.

“It’s a rotary mixer and there’s no EQs, can you fucking believe it?” she said, before bringing another track into the mix.

“This mixer is so hard to play on unless you’re really exact and I’m not that exact.

“It’s like guesswork.”

The needles on the decks kept skipping.

There was no room in the DJ booth for Patrick’s Serato-running laptop, so he had to place his computer on a waist-high bar stool. The sound kept cutting out. It was a really bad mess.

“What a show you have chosen to experience for the first one,” said Patrick out back of the club, whilst sucking on a cigarette (he smokes heavily).

Despite the obvious sound problems the crowd seemed not to care. M.A.N.D.Y. too took it in their stride and didn’t seem too upset about the audio screw up.

Because I had just spent three weeks on tour with Sasha and John Digweed on their tour bus, M.A.N.D.Y. decided to made Industry Boy tour manager.

The tour bus arrived, and M.A.N.D.Y. and Heidi were so excited to discover how plush it was that they posed for silly photos, and then stuck a Get Physical sticker on the side of the bus.

Industry Boy then repeated the same rules of the road that Patrick Tetrick, Sasha and John Digweed’s tour manager had told me when I first boarded their one bus almost exactly one month ago.

“Right. No shitting on the bus. No smoking on the bus,” I barked. It was fun being in charge.

“When you go to sleep, lie with your legs facing forwards in case there’s an accident and you break your legs.”

Patrick smiled and said: “But I’d prefer to break my neck than my legs.”

We all then took half a Xanax sleeping pill and passed out in our cosy bunks, the pitch black holes providing a post-apocalyptic feel and cut off from the world.

Around eight hours later, the bus had stopped moving. We opened our eyes and the bus doors to discover we were in Washington DC, parked up at a Marriott hotel.

Then British house and techno DJ duo Audiofly pulled up in a cab and came bounding out of the taxi like little school girls grinning warmly.

They had more energy than M.A.N.D.Y. – oh dear.

Patrick looked tired still, so he lay down on the pavement in the sun to get exactly three minutes of shut eye.

Then we all checked into the Marriott hotel – all six of us into one room.

Because we have a tour bus, we only need a day room to take showers, but six people in one room is a bit much, especially for Heidi.

“Ok I know I’m a bit of dude girl, a miss guy; but me and five guys in one room is just stupid.

“I’ve got tits you know, what am I going to do? Grow a c*ck?”

Everyone is in really good spirits though, despite all the screw ups.

“The afterparty has already started,” said Luca Saporito, one half of the Audiofly boys.

And indeed it feels like it has.

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